And Here

'S to another year!

Maybesee you Then, Later!

Grace Ophelia Grace

So four years ago this morning I received an email (my preferred method of get-to-the-point communication) that my sister directly above me in years had, in being found, confirmed all of the family’s suspicions of early-onset disappearance and death. Or, it was just her time.

It’s a difficult thing to process, the death of a loved one who knows you as intimately as to know details You don’t even know, but can accept if addressed and impressed upon, and vice versa.

I learned a lot, in every aspect of life, from this color being introduced. For one, I learned that in the grieving period lying dogs kept asleep with the aids of physical distance and time removed Will wake up with a vengeance, and manifest themselves in your relations with people, and it can get ugly.

Perhaps this is more true when it’s early-onset, as opposed to to-be-expected/diagnosed/predisposed circumstances like disease and old-age prepare.

There was so much friction in the wake of her passing, even her remains were ‘divied’ and all sides calling other sides out as false or lesser-than carers. Nobody in either of my parents immediate sibling-set has died. Or in my generation, throughout the cousins. Ophelia, or Grace, or Ophelia Grace, or Grace Ophelia, Whoever She identified as (lingering of-the-living dispute on her final name), was the first to leave the party in a Looong time, two blood-grandparents deaths in their elderly years (one in the early 1990s, my generation really young, the second for the most part estranged and blacklisted out of connecting with us), notwithstanding.

It was heavy. You can’t help but feel And Be let down.

Let me say: If you’re living you’re Not a burden, and drugs Are cheat codes with consequences. Be good to yourself more often than not, and the cheat codes become unnecessary escapes to places you’ve already put in honest work in the unavoidable struggle of life to discover.

Solar Pickup?

Yesterday an experience occurred upon ‘randomly’ thinking on something within such a short amount of time that it harkened back to a telepathic ‘experience’ I’ve written of prior. This time, Instead of awakening with the end of the Hollywood movie ‘Big’ fresh in my head and turning on the tv to find it already in tune to a channel showing exactly that, I found myself thinking a random snippet of vocal phrasing from a song by The Who, and when I turn on the radio…. A bar before!

When I woke up this morning but lay in bed, I found that the vision my closed-eyes were seeing was more like television static than normal. Television static IS SPACE (the black stuff), btw.

COULD this have anything to do with the solar flare? And the human penchant of incorporating electronics more and more in every aspect of their lives as exhibited over the past 30 years especially?

We are becoming the extra terrestrials.

Happy 30th!

Work in Progress

Some Additional Lines, this was always such a fun song to play just in chordal form for folks up in Seattle, the happiness is genuine.

Staying true by selling out because insurance was an irony too good to pass up <but then>
Walking away before an un-requite could play me in a sad reality where money made me ‘enough’

Anyhow, here’s to 30!